My brain is a wee bit battered and fried after today’s therapy session, so I thought I would try my hand at a list-type post and see what you think. 🙂
Here are 15 of the many things I’ve learned on my mental health journey. I hope they help, and feel free to ask questions in the comments!
- Progress is possible.
- Everyone progresses at their own pace.
- Everyone has different areas of focus.
- Regarding therapy, you don’t have to know what you need help with before you seek support. (It’s their job to help you figure that out.)
- Feeling anxious doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re doing something wrong or that something is wrong around you. It doesn’t mean you have to do anything to “fix” or “police” the situation.
- Try not to judge your insides based on someone else’s outsides. (This one comes from my mother-in-law, actually.)
- Think about the incredibly high standards you have for yourself. Who do they truly benefit? What would happen if you lowered the bar and let yourself breathe?
- You can be anxious and have fun at the same time. Anxiety can coexist with positive emotions and experiences.
- A lapse is not the same as a relapse. You’re never truly back to where you started, because that’s in the past and you aren’t a time traveller. (Or are you?)
- Don’t beat yourself up if you do stumble. Self-condemnation is toxic and is more likely to undo healing than it is to “push you” to greater success.
- Progress is about learning to tolerate feelings of anxiety so that those feelings become less powerful. It’s about learning to say, “Hey there, anxiety, I see you. You’re not in charge anymore, but I’m not going to pretend I don’t see you.” Anxiety doesn’t go away by pretending it’s not there.
- It’s not about reaching some “perfect” fantasy version of yourself. It’s about learning how to accept yourself as a whole package. I couldn’t truly progress until I shed the belief that I was “bad until better.”
- You are not bad. You are not weak. You are not alone.
- You deserve support.
- It’s never too late to feel better inside.
I hope you find these encouraging as your tackle you own anxiety or mental health mountains (and molehills, because those are tricky too sometimes, especially if you are a mole who is also lost in the mountains).
Wooooo. You missed your calling as a Pyschotherapist!
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Haha psycho blogger will have to do! 😉 🤪🤪
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It’s all rock and roll to us! Rock on with your bad self!
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🥳🤠🤓😈👻👾
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Lots to chew on in that list. I feel like I’m getting psychotherapy vicariously through your blog. And I’m sure that writing things down helps you to absorb and retain what you are learning on this journey. This blog is good advice for Bell Let’s Talk Day. People need to know they aren’t alone, meaning support and help is available. But also, they aren’t alone with their anxieties. Those people who you think are judging you and who you are trying to impress could very well be experiencing the same apprehensions you have. Don’t think the whole world is perfect, except for you. Everyone’s dealing with life.
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Well, here’s some self-talk in action: I’m feeling silly for not knowing that today is Bell Let’s Talk Day! I feel like that’s something that should have been on my radar! 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️
Thanks for letting me know, and you’re right about how therapeutic the writing process is for me.
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Ah, but what if the molehill connects to a cozy cave in the mountain where you can have snuggle time with a family of moles…
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I WANT TO GO TO THIS CAVE.
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😁
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Love this
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Thanks Kristen!
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5,7,8,9,10,13 yep
“Both/and” is a challenge for us. Fun causes anxiety for us, so they usually co-exist. Beating self is not helping. Thanks for being human so that we can try, too
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Thanks for reading 🙂 I’m curious about fun causing anxiety, if you don’t mind sharing. Is it that there’s inner pressure to have fun “properly” or “fully”? (That’s often the case for me. I delay hobby times bcs it’s not the perfect time or I’m not good enough at my hobby or any other number of reasons).
Please no beating self whenever possible 💜💚
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Yes, perfectionism can rob even trying. If you can’t be perfect, don’t start. And all stress is the same in this body: excitement and fear feel similar.
Been cooking and baking like a mother fucker to avoid punishing: roasted potatoes and carrots, grilled chicken, homemade blueberry muffins, now fried eggs 🍳
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Cooking and baking as therapy/self care! I haven’t tried that. Pass the muffins??
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[…] went up this week: 1) Peaceful Jaws of Avoidable Death (Countering Cognitive Distortions), 2) 15 Things I Want You to Know About Anxiety Recovery, and 3) 3 Steps to Work Through Anxious Thoughts + My […]
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